Yeah so I was doing this really intense, ancient, forbidden, ominous rite the likes of which you pewny intellects never fathomed and suddenly I extinguished my blunt and channeled the most intense grimoire ever, featuring 45 ancient timeless demons beyond time spawned by Amazarath-Gthul, this is his/her seal:
I m gonna publish it in 88 limited-edition volumes at GobbleItUpSuckers Press, quite prestigious, very arcane, much dark. Be sure to buy one at 88.88$, they r gonna be pretty expensive later, on Ebay.
Listen folks, I ve just about had it up to here with people wanting me to set them straight on why their sigil magick spells or invented grimoires don t work.
Because they re bullshit.
I pulled this seal out of my creative ass in 8 seconds. Another author will do the same. It will take me 20 minutes to write a complete grimoire, a few hundreds of dollars to have it published and profit in the thousands.
If I had a nickle for every time I ve been asked ”Mihai, is this grimoire for real” or ”Is this a good investment” AFTER buying these pieces of glittery garbage, I d be richer that the folks making a fortune on Ebay reselling them.
It`s not a real ancient text, for fuck`s sake! There is no hereditary order of demon-worshipping witches working from a well-guarded family grimoire. There are no 72 powerful jinn that you channeled to give some guy magical squiggles. There are no shortcuts.
If you have`t read my blog thus far, the study of magic is a bit hard. Manuscripts are rare. And valuable. There`s no old secret arcane manuscript passed from the 1200s to a modern day witch, but there are others, in libraries, that you can see and touch and scan. And that takes time. And money. And people like Daniel Clark and the late Daniel Schneider are witnesses.
There`s no fucking arcane master that glides his long-black-painted finger nail over a Latin spell and just translates it in a single breath. It takes wonderful people like Joseph Peterson, Stephen Skinner, Daniel Harms or David Rankine years of work and training and learning to transliterate a Latin text, with all its abbreviations and symbols to do that, and make a good book out of it.
And in writing a good, reliable book, you need writing skill and editing skill and historical flaire and academic rigor, like Richard Kieckhefer or Frank Klaassen. No, books written by Master Orgasmoroth or DimpleBreath Longingwillow are not reliable books on magic.
Shiny, thin, large-fonted, flimsy grimoires are the big-promising OnlyFan accounts. And you`re looking for grimoire hardcore porn.
Stop buying overpriced junk to feed an artsy-farsty-collectors-ego, start looking for the quality hard work put in by serious people who take years of training, writing and editing for one sigle volume.
Share only if you`re fed up by crap grimoires selling for thousands of dollars wile real historical grimoires make their hard working authors next to nothing. Love you guys.